Ask any philosopher and they all say that happiness is about being present in the moment.
Motivational posters often say something along the lines of ”Enjoy the moment”, ”Be present”, ”Focus on now”.
Sounds nice, but how do you practice living in a moment, in everyday life?
Some people might suggest starting a daily 60-minute meditation practice. That’s for sure the most effective method. However, that requires already quite a bit of self-understanding and significant commitment.
I’ll present something simple anyone can do — starting today:
Here we go.
Imagine you have just stepped into your favorite cafe and ordered your favorite beverage. You find a cozy table in the corner of the cafe, next to the window. There is only you and your favorite beverage. You can see people passing by on the street. The cafe is about half-full, with people sipping their lattes.
You have just sat down, and you will…:
Put your phone in your pocket
Leave the laptop in your bag
Make sure you have only your favorite beverage on the table
Ok — the above is easy but necessary.
What you do next, is the critical part to be able to enjoy the moment.
You need to start paying attention to your mind. That is, what you think, or rather, what you should not think.
Instead of describing what to think, for me, it was more intuitive to understand what NOT to think. While you are sitting calmly, the beverage in front of you:
Do NOT think about the future:
Don’t think about the future in any form. Don’t do future planning. Don’t think about your to-do list. Don’t start visualizing your next report/email/meeting you need to prepare. Don’t start problem-solving. Don’t think about your desires or goals.
Do NOT think about the past:
Do not think past in any form. Don’t think about the past mistakes you did. Don’t think about the regrets. Don’t think about any worries. Or any past successes either, for that matter.
So, Mikko, you just told me what NOT to think. What on earth should we be thinking then?
That’s the beauty. Absolutely nothing.
Being present. Observing people passing by on the street. Taking a sip of your favorite beverage. Appreciating the smooth mouthfeel it brings. Enjoying the small details of the architecture of the house you can see from the window.
Sounds difficult? Well, for most of us, this is actually quite difficult and doesn’t come naturally.
Most of us have experienced this feeling naturally after completing a significant work milestone, or for students, final exam. If you go back to those fainting moments, they felt really nice, didn’t they?
The good news is that this feeling is attainable in your everyday life. It’s a skill and awareness you can develop.
Personally, I learned to reach this state by paying attention to what NOT to think. It is much easier to reach the moment by NOT letting your mind wander to the future or to the past. When you avoid the future and past, the only thing left is the present.
I’ve also noticed it’s much easier to reach this state in the morning hours. It doesn’t matter if it is at home, at a cafe, or some other peaceful place. Also, after doing sports (and being disconnected from the devices), this state is easier to reach.
When you have successfully let go of the past and future, you start to see the moment. The comfort of the chair, smell of the beverage, beautiful clouds in the sky. A happy couple passing by the window. Life starts to feel really light, and really great.
Next time you go to a cafe by yourself, you can try this method for the first 5 minutes.
PS. If you actually try this in a cafe, and you reach the 'present state’, you’ll be quite amused when looking at everyone else in the cafe. You will see that ALL of the other people (you being the only exception) are all-in in the Matrix: numbing their mind with social media feeds, in a serious future planning mode with their laptops, or sharing either past memories or future plans with their friends. You are the only one who paused to enjoy the very moment.